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If I ever tell you I’m going to sleep and then you see me posting or liking things online for about an hour immediately after that, I promise I wasn’t lying to you, I’m just bad at going to sleep and it is usually a long process that begins with disengaging from any sort of immediate contact with people (chats, for example) and ends when everything on my screen is blurry and I’m hallucinating plot points I haven’t written yet
88,861 notes (via carameldelighttttt & psilentasincjelli)
98% of the female status’ I see on Facebook are ‘I hate guys, I’m gonna be a lesbian.’ Like no. We don’t want you either.
4,158 notes (via thatshitgay & touchmykittykat)
reblog if u were on tumblr before yahoo bought it
IT’S LITERALLY BEEN LIKE A DAY AND WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TRYING TO ACHIEVE WITH THIS POST
only a true tumblrite would understand. you just outed yourself as a yahooligan
131,730 notes (via iwanttattoosandatardis & cowboybeboop)
Who came up with kissing? Seriously?
Did 2 people one day accidentally bash heads together and went like, “Oh… That was nice”
*violently bashes head together again*
“This should be a thing”
kissing is a method of exchanging saliva (and thus DNA) to determine whether or not you would want to reproduce with that person
*Bashes heads once more*
You are a prime candidate for my child.
21,753 notes (via iwanttattoosandatardis & pimpeta-slap)
i am perfectly fine with having other people sit on my lap but i can’t sit on other people’s laps because i’m always paranoid that i’d crush them and they’d diE
206,792 notes (via lets-go-lesbos & magentamayhem)
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